Frustration...Is not even the word to describe it

I have started working out again. I eat under or right around my 1800 calories a day, and try to stay  within a healthy life style of eating healthy not just eating all carbs or all fats all day. Low and behold, all I lose is a .2 pounds, or better yet, gain 2 pounds. That is my favorite! I do not think frustration is the word to describe weight loss. I am not sure why losing these few pounds I gained is so hard. Why is getting out of the 300's so flipping hard? I have been stuck here since September? It just gets to you mentally. Don't get me wrong, I am mentally into this. I want to lose weight, I am actually wanting to work out and eat right and be healthy, but why is my body not cooperating. I can once again see why someone could and would quit! I guess today is a new day of a new week and and all I can do is keep on keeping on, and so can you...Good luck:)

Its that time of year...Again

I guess I need to say I will see you all next year. I am not sure if anyone even reads this crap I write! I am hearing about all these new years resolutions on the TV tonight and have seen 8394723847324897329 commercials for different weight loss products and programs and all I can think of is the majority of the people joining these programs, and buying into this stuff will fail within 3 weeks. How horrible is that thinking? OH well, its the truth! Most guys see such a huge influx of people within the first few weeks of the year and by February they are all gone. I do not have the answer to what keeps people going, and what keeps people to go to the next year on the resolutions they make. I find that for me personally I really had to make a mental change and really had to want to change. There was a mental change there that was not there before. So here we are on December 31, 2012 about to embark on a bunch of empty resolutions and I have no way of helping you other than maybe some inspiration. Here is a picture of me from December of 2011- December 2012. I am sorry I don't have the answers. Just keep on keeping on and do not try to do too much at one time. That is the biggest thing I can say. Do not go to the gym for 3 hours every day this week or next, it wont work. Just start out a little bit, cut out one thing. Good luck!

Here is a picture from January and the 2nd is from tonight dec 31, 2012

It's Ok to Throw It away

Something that I have learned over this year is that it truly is OK to throw food away. It is OK to pour the sweat tea down the drain that is causing you to drink too many calories. Its OK to throw away the batch of cookies you made last week for yourself, but make sure you destroy them not just throw them into the trash. Pour the cookies out of the bag, or down the sink. Make sure those puppies are all ruined and you cant go back to that temptation!
This time of year is a struggle for many people with weight loss. I read online yesterday the last 2 weeks of the year is 4% of the year, and there is no reason to slide by the last 2 weeks and start on January 1st again. I have a milk allergy so to have cookies made is a special occasion. I have thrown things throughout the year this year because I knew I no longer needed them, and all I would do is eat and eat the food. I am so frugal so my frugalness was killing me throwing out the food, but my weight will kill me first. I am just giving you permission to buy a treat, eat part of it then throw the rest away, it really is OK. Do not wait till next week to get back on the weight loss wagon, or start the weight loss wagon, start today.

Weight gain

I can really see how someone can gain all the weight back. I never understood it before. I always got mad at the people I saw on TV who lost all the weight and then gain it all back. It is so easy to just get into a rut and start gaining weight back. I had knee surgery and its been way harder to get back into life than I expected, and I had just a minor surgery. I had to stop working out with my trainer.
I am so back into losing weight. I will not lose the 100 pound weight goal this year, which is really sad to me. At first I got down about the weight loss and started gaining. Now, I'm back at it realizing its the long term:). One month left till the new year!!

Knee surgery

So had a MRI and the dr found out I had a discoid meniscus. I had surgery a week ago today to reshape it. Surgery went fine, but I gained 9 pounds overnight it seemed. I think I'm holding onto a lot of water, which is very annoying. I am still up today, I hope that I can go back down. Still on bed rest. I get my stitches out next week :)

Knee injury

I had knee surgery back quit a few years ago. Ever since I started working out my knee has been getting way worse. I haven't been able to work out practically all week. My psuedotumor has been acting up crazy. I have had a bad week. I am really trying to keep my eating under control even though I'm not working out, it's so difficult. I find out Tuesday about my knee.

The Magic Dust

Weight loss sucks! It is super hard, time consuming, it is overwhelming, and about 20 other adjectives. I have been hitting many mental blocks at the gym lately, and in life. I am really trying to get my life in order and trying to live life and change it all at the same time.

I have been catching up on my Hulu, Extreme Makeover weight loss edition. The girl who was on the episode I watched yesterday mentioned something to the trainer in the process of the weight loss, I really thought you had some Magic Dust. I feel the same way sometimes as well. I always thought that going on one of these shows, or having a trainer was going to be that 'magic' to change everything. I have learned that Mary is the only thing that has this 'magic'. Weight loss is really is time+effort=results. Nothing magic about that. My trainer keeps telling me that the motivation will come will results. I really am learning how to motivate myself to go to the gym and eating healthy even if I don't feel like it.

I am down to 311, so close to being out of the 310s, out of the 300s...which I have not been out of the 300s since I can even remember. I am really thinking since I was in high school or right after.

Here is a picture of my 50 pound bead :)

Here is a picture of me from early in the year January and to today.

This weeks goal is to get to 30 seconds holding myself on a plank, and doing 30 sets of push ups (girlie style) its going to be a hard week)